POETRY BY SAMANTHA SLAVEN

Samantha Slaven is a professional wrestling fan, horror lover, and poet living in Suburban Philadelphia with her husband Shawn, and familiar Vader.

Samantha’s previous conjurings can be found in the Winter, Spring, and Summer quarterlies for 2024 of Glass Gates Publishing, the inaugural zine for the “Bring a Blanket” reading series; in issues six,  seven, and eight of Collide Zine; and the “Pup Pup Blog” of Meow Meow Pow Pow Lit, among  others. 

EMPTY GRAVE

A hole going six feet deep 
My future resting place
Dug in advance 
Always prepared 

I look forward to the long rest
To joining the departed souls of the past 
To stopping turmoil and hurt
You, however, will be missed

I’ll miss the brick wall we used to stop near
Our conversations about the mundane
Paying bills on your laptop
Eating wings at local haunts

I’ll miss walking the dog after a rainstorm
Watching moonsaults and high fliers
Miss plane rides to the happiest place on Earth

I’ll miss the love we shared
The parking lot pick ups
The drives to get groceries

The fights
The kisses
The hugs
The snoring alarms 

I’ll miss shrinking your shirts in the dryer 
Knocking over piles of cards for gaming
Hearing your mom and dad on the car speaker 
Saying goodbye to you every morning

What will you miss about me? 
Will you miss my laugh
My snorting 
My voice when I get excited 
My passion
My frustrated stare

Will you miss my nicknames
My talk of undesirable coworkers 
My interest in you and your loves
My persistence 
My drive

We’re several years off from the final dance
A last duet to usher me into my dirt nap

An empty grave sits and waits
For how long we don’t know
But she’s proud
To receive my chilled, decaying body
When it’s ready to return home

WORTHY

To know what you’re worth 
Is more than love 
Of self

It is to know the warmth of clothing

To care for the body, the mind, and the soul
By wrapping the skin in expression 

To feel heard in a crowd
Or amongst friends 

To understand 
You are deserving of acknowledgment 

You and you alone
Are the author of your own story 
No narrator should ever speak on your behalf 

You are stable
Unmoving
Yet evolving
Into a true form
Reflective of identity 
And capable of change 

To know your worth 
Is to know inside and out 
Who you are 
And to embrace all facets 
And to be enamored 
By all parts

SLEEP

Confined in a chamber
A sliver of sun to the right
An escape on the left 
I’m paralyzed
Sinking into the soft embrace of the container 

Wrapped so gently
Yet 
Peace does not come
No relief 
No reprieve 

The door within reach
I do not move

I lay
The blankness overhead
Counting spots 
Daydreaming of the world beyond

It is deemed I can leave 
I’m escorted out
A broken husk 
Having fought a battle 
Unseen to most

A barrier surrounds me
Speech is impeded 
Mannerisms exaggerated 
Overcompensating for trying to live while dead 

I’m returned to the holding cell
The nighttime routine begins again

Forever may the cycle reign