On this month's Special Page:

A Fun Article From a Psychic's Perspective

Alexis Donkin is The Destructrix, offering thoughtful mentorship and psychic insight at crossroads moments. She is accomplished in many things: from publishing and music, to art and language. Steeped in herbal tea, Alexis is the witchy bestie you've always wanted.

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Professional psychic Alexis Donkin tells us how to find the right psychic

Every human is psychic, in theory. It’s the same as being able to dance or play basketball – in theory any human could do it, but not everyone performs at the same level. Sometimes it’s because we have a physical or mental difference. Sometimes it is because we aren’t aware that we have abilities, or don’t fine-tune those abilities. Sometimes it’s because we ignore those abilities or don’t believe we have them.

For those of you who don’t believe you have the abilities but are interested in learning more about yourself, psychic readings are a tool that can give you powerful insights into crossroads moments in your life. They can bring you closure around difficult moments, loss, and help you find the right path forward for your highest good.

Because of a long history of false understandings of what psychics do, flashy Hollywood portrayals of psychics, and 20th century psychology, being psychic is highly stigmatized and a lot of people think they are con artists or performers. While it is true that because psychics deal with the unknown and impossible to prove, it attracts a lot of narcissists and charlatans, there are plenty of good, accurate, wonderful professional psychics. It is possible to find someone who can connect to your dead loved ones, tell you the thing you most need to hear, and even give you the next right step to creating a dream future. The key is to know the red and green flags so that you find an ethical and quality professional who gives you what you want and need in a psychic reading.

Keep in mind, this person will be touching your soul. A psychic reading is incredibly intimate. No one will know you like a psychic. In the most powerful readings, you may find yourself shivering, shocked, your hair standing on end, crying, and laughing. Because of this it is extremely important the psychic has the right vibe for you. Do not take this lightly.

Not everyone will be the psychic version of Maria Tall Chief or Kobe Bryant. Those are the people who have more sensitivity, faster connections for psychic work, and an interest in pursuing it. Those are the kind of people you pay for readings even if you have some intuition.

Different Kinds of Psychics

Each psychic you meet will be different because people are different. We all have different cultural backgrounds, life experiences, expectations, hopes, and dreams. Our preferences will also dictate what feels good to practice with psychic development. Because of all these factors, while there may be some similarities between psychics, each of them will have their psychic senses express differently and their skills will manifest differently.

When we think of different psychics, typically we think of the skills themselves and name the psychic accordingly:

• animal communicator
• reiki master
• seer
• medium
• channel
• aura reader

Alternatively, we think of the tools they use for divination:

• tarot
• runes
• pendulum
• crystals
• light language
• tea leaves
• palms

However, all psychics don’t use all possible psychic skills and they don’t all practice divination. For this reason, it’s really important that you get clear about what you want when you go looking for a psychic reading.

Finding Your Psychic Person

A psychic touches your soul, so you want this to be someone you feel really good about and feel safe being vulnerable with. There are some key things to think about when you want to book your first reading.

1. What Kind of Reading Do You Want?

As mentioned above, psychics vary widely, so you want to make sure that if you want a tarot reading, you find someone who reads tarot. If you want a mediumship reading, you want to make sure the medium you find actually does the kind of medium service you want. Be as clear as possible about what you’re looking for. This will make finding the right person a lot easier because you can easily say no to anyone who doesn’t offer the kind of reading you want. So if you are looking to talk to your dead grandma, you want to narrow your search to mediums. Within mediums, you want to make sure they actually offer passed loved one sessions of some kind.

2. Ethics, Ethics, Ethics!

Because psychics help people at challenging or confusing moments in life, the industry is a magnet for unethical and predatory people. There are a lot of cons who are just looking for a quick buck. Others want to feel special, and may even be looking to become a kind of cult leader. To make sure you find a psychic who is ethical and wants your highest good, look out for these things:

• They should be willing to answer any questions you have about their services, skills, and abilities.
• They should never cold DM you.
• They should never be “gloom and doom” or make you feel bad about yourself.
• They should practice confidentiality.
• It should be easy to find testimonials or past clients to talk to about their services.
• They should never hard pressure you to make a decision about a reading.
• They should always seek your highest good – even if that means directing you to a different psychic who would be a better fit.

An additional green flag is when psychics openly talk about ethics – generally if a psychic is talking about how to be ethical, they are. I’ve never seen a professional psychic use the word ethical in their social media or website and not be ethical. This is a sign you’ve found a good one!

Another green flag is if a psychic talks about consent in their work. If they talk about consent in how they use their abilities, read people, etc, this is another green flag because it shows they are concerned about the boundaries of everyone around them. If someone asks you for permission before doing something, they will respect you and treat you well in the very intimate setting of psychic reading!

3. Don’t Forget the Vibes!

Beyond these things, probably more than anything, you want to make sure the psychic in question actually is someone you like. Their energy needs to mesh with your own. They need to communicate in a way that you are able to receive whatever messages come through in your reading. For example, I can be really confronting. I have some heavy Dark Feminine TM vibes, and that is not for everyone. For the people who like direct communication wrapped in black and burgundy, I’m a really good match. If you need someone who is all fluffy bunnies and angels, I’m not your person, and I can recommend someone who is.

Honestly, even if the type of reading isn’t quite what you were hoping for, but the psychic has the right vibes, I would stick with a psychic who matches you best. Readings are best when they come from the right person, not the right form. If you struggle to find a good match with a psychic who gives the specific reading you’re looking for, go back and try broadening your reading type to expand your search.

4. Ask Your Friends.

This takes a little bravery depending on your friend group, but if you can handle it, ask your friends for their psychic recommendations. You may be surprised at how many of them have used psychics for all sorts of things, many may be repeat customers!

The reason you want recommendations from friends is they will have positive feelings about psychics they’ve used and will be able to warn you off known con artists. Even if you don’t go with any of their recommendations, it’s a great place to start!

What’s In A Reading?

Once you’ve found your person, psychic readings can vary greatly from psychic to psychic, however there are a few general things you can expect.

Typically you pay for readings up front because this is the kind of thing is always a gamble (it’s impossible to know what will come through) and it takes a lot of energy and skill to do. Once payment is confirmed, unless you are doing a written reading, you will schedule your reading, either with the psychic directly or via their booking app. You will likely confirm the reading type and any special focus or questions at that time.

If your reading is remote, the psychic may ask for you to provide an image in advance. If it is in person, they may ask you to bring an object to your session.

Remote sessions involve some kind of video conferencing application or an audio call, depending on the psychic and your preferences. In person, you could possibly meet in their office, a park, coffee shop, or even your home. Location will depend on the psychic and what works best for you!

When it comes time for your reading, a good psychic will explain their process to you and answer any questions before they get started. Some will record the reading for you, while others will allow you to record it yourself.

Some psychics may ask you to do some kind of centering practice with them, such as deep breathing, or they may do it alone. If the reading is done live, the psychic will connect with Spirit and begin sharing any intuitive hits or use their divination tools in the moment. If the reading was prepared in advance, the psychic will share what came through along with any interpretation and thoughts they have.

A good psychic will have a wealth of knowledge to interpret and explain collective symbols to you from visions or divination tools. They will also point you to consider any personal meaning symbols have, for example, a basketball may mean a popular sport, or for you it may remind you of all the times you used to hang out with your favorite Uncle Joe. Personal meanings change the interpretation of a reading a lot.

After the psychic has shared their reading and any added knowledge of symbols that came up, you will often have time to ask additional questions and share thoughts about things that arose in the reading. Sometimes the messages that come through are very clear and obvious, whereas other times they will be very difficult to understand and may take time to unpack. Regardless, the meaning you find in a reading during your session is only part of the message.

Psychic readings are what I call “digital information” in that they communicate a lot of information in layers. Time and space do not matter to Spirit, and so your reading will have different meanings at different times. I always urge clients to revisit a reading a week, month, three months, and even a year later to see how it lands for you.

In the week following your reading, if the psychic recorded it, they will send you any relevant files. Sometimes they may send you a report of your reading. For example, I typically send a report that includes images if any objects were used (such as cards or crystals), an explanation of the type of reading as a reminder, the reading itself, an interpretation based on my knowledge and any conversation if there was a session, along with future steps such as journal prompts or practices to use moving forward. It’s very involved and thorough to allow you to get the most out of our time together!

While there are as many types of psychics as there are people, its not only possible to find the right psychic for you, but inevitable. When you keep in mind the tips in this article, use your own intuition, and open yourself to what Spirit has for you, the right person will find you at the right time. Trust this is true, and you’ll find amazing experiences and assistance available to you. Who knows? Maybe you’ve already found them, you just need to reach out!